Notes from Danny Silk, Feb. 14, 2009

These notes came from the Culture of Honor Seminar. I am tired, but want to get them out before the moment passes. I will come back and edit later if they do not make sense. :-)

Danny's job at Bethel is to create a "fireplace" for the fire carriers he works with on a daily basis. Fire is a great thing, but we don't want "fire on the sofa," so to speak.

A culture of honor allows us to be uniquely different and uniquely powerful. Freedom is not for everyone to be the same.

To be free is to be able to put the best you have on display.

Definitions of honor:
1) To glory in, or promote. Honor does not happen among strangers, it happens among those who are closest to you, who have disappointed you, hurt you. We are told a blessing comes with honoring our parents. Who do we know better? And who has had the opportunity to disappoint and hurt us the most? Honoring our parents and previous generations is a way to pull out the good inheritance. Find the glory that was in them, whether they used it well or not, and claim that as your inheritance. We have 2 choices of how to gain inheritance. We can gain it through honor or through resentment; unforgiveness or glory.

2) To elevate the status of another. Ex. Jonathan giving his royal regalia to David, a lowly shepherd. Jesus has also given us royal regalia. We are co-heirs with Christ. Question for thought. Some ask why God allows poverty, suffering, injustice, etc. A better question might be, . . . "If we are empowered to be greater than Christ on this earth, why do we allow these things to happen?"

3) To give prestige to somebody. Prestige = Access to resources. ex. Billionaire friend. This partner creates resources and opportunities you would never have on your own. When we are honoring someone, we are offering them resources and opportunities they would not have access to without us. (By the same token, when God honors us, we receive His prestige.) Side note: Don't try to make your pastor the king, attempting to draw people into your kingdom. Instead, take your prestige to everyone on the island.

4) Great respect and admiration. This is typically given to those we agree with or whom we are like. We have more difficulty offering respect and admiration to those different from us or who do not agree with us.

Admiration = wonder - finding the best about you. Honor manifests when we disagree, not when we are getting along.

THE HEART OF HONOR IS EMPOWERMENT. Nothing about you determines if I will honor you or not. I honor you because I am an honoring person. When someone disagrees with me, can I honor them still? Honor ALL people. Can I do that? or can I only honor those who agree with me? We think we have the right to judge/dishonor those we disagree with or who do not follow what we believe to be God's will.

Do I really need to honor/empower everyone?? What about children?? women??? sinners???? What if they are knowingly sinning?! Yes, we are called to honor/empower all, regardless.

Empowering does not = ignoring. It requires action.

What makes me more powerful than you? Typically people say things like Violence = Power or Anger = Power. We say, "I will introduce suffering into your life if you do not give me what I want. I am willing to hurt you to get my way." We believe and feed others the lie, "Other people have power over you." We teach this lie to our children.

We teach that LOVE is a Mac Daddy yellow truck crushing a little red truck when the yellow truck does not get it's way. Then we teach people that God is love. God becomes the ultimate Mac Daddy yellow truck, ready to crush us at a moment's notice. We get this picture of an angry God who can only control his temper by looking at a picture of Jesus and reminding Himself, "No, can't completely destroy them because of my son . . ."

Question: If God is punishing us for our sin, why are we still alive? Shouldn't we all be LONG gone by now? Consequences are not God punishing us. I John 4:18

If we remove the threat of punishment from our community, why will people behave? What will motivate them? How will we control them?

We need everybody powerful AND we need to have the keys to confronting people. We need to learn to confront in ways that will not trigger people's defenses. We need people to be powerful because you can not confront powerless people and have a good result - and we need to be able to confront one another.

"We don't confront prisoners, we try to calm them down." Paul Manwarring 2008. You can't confront a prisoner with good results.

We are afraid of conflict. We must learn to confront one another. How can we walk alongside you and fix this? How much trust is there in this relationship.

KINGDOM CONFRONTATION
In Kingdom confrontation, you must have 3 things, Trust, Self-Control, and Good Questions. Strength or relationship sets the tone for this to be able to happen. (Visual Aid of a tissue being ripped easily and a rope holding firm.)

Truth cultivates trust.

I can control myself on a good day. I can never control you.

Learn to ask good questions, not just throw scripture at people and judge them. (Story of man on staff who was like a torch running through a hayfield. He had to help train the man to think, plan, and pay attention to the things that did not come naturally, but not in a dictatorial fashion. Powerful guy meets powerful guy.)

Ex. Abraham and God bargaining over the destruction of Sodom. If God is confrontable, who is not?

Heaven trusts us amazingly.

Psalm 32:8 You will see my heart through my eyes.
Psalm 32:9 Don't live to need a cop.

Powerless people need rules, not freedom. Powerful people demand freedom.

2 Corinthians 3:17 in The Message.

Video clip of Stacy at the Quarter Horse Championship. (She coaxed her horse to do things no one else could get a horse to do, using only her voice and a gentle touch. Riding bareback with no bit in the horses mouth, no reigns, just her voice and gentle touch.)

How are Covenant and Honor Connected?
Covenant Purpose - Galatians 2:20

Side Note: Jesus did not help everyone while he was here. There were towns he simply passed through. In fact, he was going to pass by the disciples the night he was walking on water, (and they were struggling with their oars!)but they stopped him.

THE NATURE OF COVENANT
A binding agreement requiring death.
****Genesis 15 - God and Abram
****Old Testament sacrifices on the altar.
****Baptism and Resurrection.

Walking through death together implies, "May the same fate fall upon us if we break the covenant." There is no real covenant until there is death. John 12:23-24 I Corinthians 15:36-38

You do not determine the outcome of the other person in the covenant relationship. "I will add strength to your life, but I can not control what you do with it."

Hebrews 9:17

You don't really see the covenant until you see a corpse. When you might embarrass me and I walk away, I fail the test of covenant.

A relationship becomes a covenant when I convince those around me that I will die to protect the relationship. I am willing to put my name on you and your failure. I BELIEVE THAT YOUR FAILURE WILL BE EXTINGUISHED BY THE GREATNESS IN YOU THAT WILL EVENTUALLY BE REVEALED.

When I am truly in covenant with you, you will feel my strength being poured into you.

Redwood roots only go six feet under. There strength comes from the fact that the roots of the entire grove intertwine and grow together. The have "lateral roots."

"I will find a way through these obstacles with you." I am now facing situations that are created by someone else's life that I can not control.

KNOWING PEOPLE OF COVENANT HELPS MAKE COVENANT POSSIBLE
Being people of covenant makes it contagious. It is a willingness to believe in you through your mistakes and failures. "I will confront you until your nose falls off, but I will never stop believing in you."

Ex: Farmer with prize winning corn was asked how he manages to win every single year. He answered that he takes his prize winning corn and hands out it's seed to all of the neighboring farmers. This ensures that the pollen surrounding next year's crop is as good as it can possibly be.

Who are the people you are currently surrounding yourself with?

Galatians 2:20

Again, I don't control you with my seed.

Good stuff! I can't wait for tomorrow night!